Audio Verse Awards Celebration: Less Is Morgue Blooper Reel

Thanks to the support of this show’s amazing fans - such as you - we’re one of the winners of the Best New Audio Drama Productions of 2020, courtesy of the AudioVerse Awards. We couldn’t be happier, and to show our thanks, we want to give you this permanent record of our horrible mistakes.

+Transcript

Alexis Bristowe: Let’s put this thing on, and let’s get cooking, I guess.

SOUND: Background music begins.

Chad Ellis: This is Chad Ellis doing Todd for Less Is Morgue, with what will potentially be one of the more absurd things I’ve sent someone.

Alexis Bristowe: F? [Laughs] Fuckin’...Memes.

Chad Ellis: [Laughs creepily; Wheezing] How am I breathing into the mic from that far away? I’m like a foot away from this thing.

Meg Tuten: [As Evelyn] Aaaaand he’s got over a thousand followers on Instagram. [Breaks character] Over a hundred thousand followers. Ugh. Over a thousand followers ain’t shit.

Henry Galley: [Quietly; In the background] Mr. Big Deal.

Meg Tuten: [Laughs] Oh yeah, Mr. Big Deal.

Alexis Bristowe: In the end, if you want full media coverage, you’ll need to subscribe to so many different services it’ll basically be a cable- [Flubs line] Aaaah! AAAAAAAH! AAAAH!

Chad Ellis: Now we’re just gonna play with like completely Todd doesn’t know how to laugh. [Very offputting laugh]

Meg Tuten: [As Evelyn] He’s got over a thousand...Hundred…[Sighs; Breaks character] I can’t do numbers.

Jeremy Showell: [As Silverbirch] NOOOOOOOO! [Coughs; Laughs] I don’t think they’re gonna want me to go that hard, but I’m gonna leave ‘em in. [Coughs; Laughs]

Meg Tuten: [As Evelyn] We managed to pro-cord a pretty good show. [Trying again] We managed to record a pretty good show. Maybe next das- [Sighs; Breaks character] I’m fucking it up so much.

Alexis Bristowe: I’m gonna ask them how they choose the objects they use in their art work. Art- Ort, ort, ort, ort, ort. Riley just becomes a fuckin’...[Laughs] Halo Elite. I don’t know. Fuckin’ leave me alone, man. Umm…

Chad Ellis: I’m just trying to imagine like...what would Elon Musk do if just like someone told him that he couldn’t just like buy a baby from a loving parent and serve it on a platter. [Upsetting Elon-esque laugh.]

Jeremy Showell: [As Silverbirch] PHOTOSYNTHESIS BEEEEAAAAM! [Trails off, hardcore; Breaks character] I’m sweating now. [Laughs]

Alexis Bristowe: Hey Jon. Ugh. [Hits chest; Burps] Excuse me.

Erin Lillis: Look, can one of you help me out of this mirror? It’s not flattering today [Breaks down laughing].

Meg Tuten: This line is giving me...some struggles. I am Mr. Struggle.

Henry Galley: [As The Superintendent] It’s bad enough I don’t have my own original, fully-formed evil scheme [Stops for breath; Breaks character] These are very long sentences, Charlie.

Alexis Bristowe: Oh lord they’re coming [Laughs] That’s not sexual…

Erin Lillis: This is me sipping the wine and enjoying it and getting out of the mirror I guess. I don’t know. [Kermit voice] Here’s some extra noises.

Meg Tuten: [As Evelyn] There are plenty of cool nature trails you can try. Heck, I used to hike… [Breaks character after seeing the word “Apalachicola''] Oh god, this word’s gonna kill me. [As Evelyn] Heck, I used to hike up in Apalachicola Natch-ional Forest all- [Sighs; Breaks character] Apalachicola Natch-ional forest. Apalachicola National Forest. Fuck.

Charlie Porritt: Signature catchphrase! Not even my sonic plot convenience generator device can- [Breaks down laughing at own joke] Oops.

Alexis Bristowe: Episode six. Part 2. By part 2, I mean my dumb ass...deleted...the first time I recorded this.

SOUND: Charlie and Meg Laughing.

Henry Galley: [Exasperated] Can I have a little professionalism here, guys?

Charlie: [Laughing] Sorry!

Meg Tuten: [To fireworks] Excuse me, Sir. I am trying to record here and you are firing off fireworks…Full five fucking days after the 5th of November...Can you chill?

Alexis Bristowe: [Robotic] We are recording this at night. [Normal] Alright.

Alexis Bristowe: You sound like somebody about to snatch a child.

Chad Ellis: You would know, Myxter Alamazons.

SOUND: Everyone laughs.

Meg Tuten: The wickedly talented...Adele Dazeem.

Alexis Bristowe: OOhhhh that Taco Bell is fighting me.

David Ault: The most hilarious screams, I tell you, such a madlad. [Affecting a posher voice] Actually, I’m going to posh this up a little bit.

Alexis Bristowe: I feel like my mouth just ran the Olympics. Blegh.

Charlie Porritt: Continuitary- [Breaks character; Whispers] Continuitary. I’m doing it again. Fuck.

Alexis: My nose is itchy...Everything’s itchy…

Henry Galley: [As Florida Man; Making uncomfortable makeout noises] Mmmm, give it to me, baby. [More uncomfortable makeout noises.] Ohhh yeah.

SOUND: Music stops.

Henry Galley: [Drops character] I’m so fucking sorry, Scott.

[END]